The End...

Have you ever ruined your own life? I have. It was this girl. I thought we were meant to be. I was a dick. She finally gave up on taking my crap. She hates my guts. I don't blaim her. I wish I could take everything back, but it doesn't matter now. She hates me, and that is that. The end is here for my friendship with her. All gone, all the memories. They are stuck in my head and are never going to leave. I will miss her deeply. I will be in agony. I was such an ass, and now she is gone. If you have any ideas to help me out, maybe I still have a shot of just being her friend. Someone please. Give me your comments. I need some advice. So she wont hate me. God life sucks when you hurt someone else. I wish I could go back, and not do all that shit. We were perfect her and I. Until I ruined it with one big lie. I said I was angry with her. I wasn't. If I could go back. I would not have done it. Please Allison don't hate me. I needed your attention. That is the only reason I did it, and I lost you for it. I will hurt deeply, but it will subside. If I can only hear that you don't hate me for life. Please Allison, I know it is final. But maybe one day, we can look past the problems and start over again. What did you feel the day you met me? I know what I felt. It was a fire. Deep in my soul. A fire that would burn forever, and can't be put out. I wish we could try just one last time. But I know it's the end. I ruined our lives.

Well for all my old visitors and some of them new. Here is what I call guess my mood.














This one is special. There is no guessing. It is right above this line of text. For those who want to know it. My mood is empty. What kind of mood is that? Well it is not a mood your are correct. It is a feeling. It stands for empty. Because that is what I feel inside. Empty for all of that shit I put you through. I wish we could have made it but my problems were too much. I am sorry to my viewers but I am going to take a leave of absence. I have to find myself. I will visit my blog every day. To read comments. But there will be no new posts until I decide to come back.

Once again. I am sorry Allison. I wish I could make it all go away. I am a dick. And I don't blame you for leaving me.